Many Peru Nordiques braved RAGNAROK, the battle at the end of the world. Warm conditions and klister skis presented the mighty Nordic warriors with many challenges as they ascended to the GOAT.
Keith Kogut led the assault, but in spite of the fastest time did not appease the GOAT with enough gifts. “She was not pleased with my collection of oboe reeds, all she smiled upon was my tin of Swix Polar.”
Evan Greenberg was next to the Summit, and he did his best to appeal to the GOAT. “I picked up at least 35 sticks en route, and I even brought a receipt from High Peaks Cyclery. She was moderately pleased.”
Mike Tuthill got lost along the way, and arrived adorned with New Orleans Saints attire. “I did not realize that the GOAT was such a die-hard fan of the New York Jets!” Needless to say, the GOAT was not at all amused.
Bob Maswick and Jim Kobak traversed the treacherous trail together, swapping leads to conserve energy. At the line, Maswick attacked as Kobak bent over to pick up a few pine cones to win the sprint. The GOAT was pleased.
Maz had some fitting tribute, including some old Loppet granola bars a NYSSRA Nordic ski tie and one Skadi boot buddy. And the GOAT was very amused with the handful of snowfleas that he brought. However he could not compete with the rucksack full of treasures that Kobak delivered to the GOAT. The GOAT smiled as she listened to The Thing that Should Not Be while gently stroking Juha Mieto’s beard.
Thus Mjollnir was bestowed upon Kobak, and all of the awesome power therewith is now his. Kobak then exclaimed excitedly “I must now utilize this awesome power to smite all foes in the Lake Placid Loppet!” And hence, the Loppet was cancelled.