The annual gastronomic tradition of Fat Tuesday took place at MitcHELLbeiner Skistadion this week. Competitors had to ski 2 x 2.5 km laps, in between laps they must eat fine american cuisine and they get to deduct the number of Calories in seconds from their overall time. It is kind of like a biathlon of gluttony.
This is quite a tactical race. Skiers must select a snack food that can easily be consumed and digested, and must fight off vomiting so that they are not disqualified.
An assortment of culinary goodies were on hand, including cup cakes, pop tarts and a delectable chocolate pudding pie.
Chris Rose skied the fastest overall time, but his choice of granola bar did not enable him to even crack the podium. The overall championship went to Jim Kobak who consumed 400 calories of cup cakes.
Steve Bailey downed the greatest calorie content to capture the silver medal. He fought his way through a partially frozen pudding pie. Randy Wint captured the Bronze. Randy gnawed his way through a extra large Snickers bar, thankful he didn’t go with his first choice, a frozen Charleston Chew.
Tom Moffet made a few tactical mistakes, including going with the ultra-dry Pop Tart selection. Even by going “sandwich style” he struggled to wolf down the dry toaster treat. “Next year I’m going to wash it down with a Moutntain Dew.”
Name Time Calories Total
Kobak 18:40, 400 Calorie cup cakes, 12:oo
Bailey 21:03, 520 Calorie Pudding Pie, 12:23
Wint 19:18, 280 Calorie Large Snickers, 14:38
Moffett 21:40, 410,000 calorie Pop-Tarts, 14:50
Rose 18:311, 220 Calorie Granola Bar, 14:51
With the win, Kobak moved into the overall lead for the Viking Helmet. The VHCS continues next week with the annual Skatona 800!