Scandal! Mitch of HELL admits to DHMO use, implicates most of Peru Nordic

Mitchell... Sauced on DHMO?
Mitchell... Sauced on DHMO?

“I admit, I have been using DHMO for years, in fact, I have been using for as long as I remember.”  Said a somber Charlie Mitchell at a press conference following this week’s VHCS race at MitcHELLbeiner Skistadion.  “… I can also say with confidence that there is no doubt that use of this substance is rampant amongst Peru Nordic, and the NYSSRA Scene in general.”

Mitchell is the first major Peru Nordic star to admit to using the performance enhancing chemical.  And sources say that he may have even been distributing DHMO for years.  Speculation is that Charlie has even been giving it to his children!

Peru Nordic’s Jim Kobak did not admit to using DHMO, but did state “… as far as I know, DHMO is not on any banned substance list, WADA or otherwise.  I know it is an extremely dangerous substance, but until it’s banned, I have no problem with any of our guys using it.”

DHMO has been a problem for years, it is a readily available substance, and although it has unprecedented performance enhancing powers, it is also extremely deadly if used improperly.  There have been fatal overdoses, and users who have quit “cold turkey” usually die a painful horrible death within a few days.  It is not a controlled substance, but is regulated by some local municipalities.

Get the facts about DHMO here

Windbreifs will continue to follow this breaking scandal… stay tuned.

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